Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Thanksgiving Break and Musings on Dad's Deployment

Hello, dears! In two days, I will have been on Thanksgiving Break for a week. That's absolutely crazy; I still feel like I just got home. At the same time, I feel like it's been forever since I was back in my room at Tech. I'm not sure how I can explain those two co-existing feelings, but the disparity definitely says a lot about me.

Since coming home, I've done quite a lot. I've read five books, written one 6 page paper, caught up on iCarly, spent time with my mom, babysat, and just plain relaxed. You have absolutely no idea how good it felt for me to be able to just veg in bed reading for fun. It's been so very long since I've gotten the chance to do that. This semester at school has been so ridiculous that I honestly had not gotten a single chance to read a book for fun. I've started several over the semester, but had not managed to finish a single one. I have a feeling that next semester is going to be just as bad, but I will survive, somehow. Especially if I have such relaxing breaks as this one.

The one non-relaxing element of this break so far was that horrible paper I had to write. I've never had such a difficult time writing a paper in my life. The novel we had to write about, Midnight Cowboy, is so obscure that there weren't any sources about it. That was quite frustrating. It's done now, but I'd venture to say it's one of my worst ever. It just felt disjointed and pointless the whole way through. I hate sending in papers that leave me feeling that way, but, I'll have a chance to make it better after my teacher gets a look at it, so everything will be fine. I'm just glad I have that weight off of my shoulders and can now enjoy the rest of my break. I do still have more work to do over the break, but nothing so horrible and exhausting as a paper.

Because of that unexpected hitch, I didn't get to go to Dennis' show at the NorVa tonight, but he says it was probably their best-sounding show yet, so I'm extremely proud of him. :) I still wish I could have been there to support them. Dennis was the most optimistic he's been after an Early Departure concert tonight, so that was a good sign. In addition to being there for him, I would have been able to see a bunch of people I wouldn't otherwise have seen on break, but, that paper just had to get done.

I'm not excited to spend a holiday without my dad. We all miss him a lot and it'll be rough having the fact that he's not with us so glaringly at the forefront of our thoughts tomorrow, but we'll make it through. My dad has it worse, after all. He doesn't have the rest of the family to console him on the absence. He's by himself in Iraq. I'm sure he and his new friends will find a way to celebrate the holiday that helps them feel a semblance of the comfort he'd feel here at home. I think, next to my family, he'll probably most miss doing all of the cooking in the kitchen with the family. You'd swear we were Italian, we're so loud when we're all together in the kitchen. I'm going to miss that this year. I wish I knew exactly what my mom felt about my dad being deployed. I know it has to be hard on her. I just feel so horrible for her and my dad. To have to be apart for a year when they love each other so much must be so very hard. I know my mom is lifting it all up to Jesus and I'm very glad for that. She knows how to make every season in her life bring her closer to God. My mom is such a beautiful, wonderful person. I'm so blessed to be her daughter.

Sigh. On the brighter side, I got to talk to my dad on the phone for at least twenty minutes yesterday. It was so great to hear his voice and just talk about all the little details of our lives that we don't often get the chance to share anymore. It seems he's definitely coming home for my Spring Break, though, and I'm beyond excited for that. It was frustrating thinking that the date was up in the air for so long. It will be so good to have him home.

I have a lot on my mind and a few things I still need to do before I fall asleep on my all-too-comfortable bed, so I better stop for now. You all know from experience I could go on even longer. :P

Have beautiful Thanksgivings, everyone! Don't forget to thank the One who blesses us all so thoroughly. <3

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